Posts Tagged ‘facebook


Tips From the Hook-Up Handbook

So, I am sort of in the midst of getting hooked up with a random guy. I describe him that way ‘cause so far there’s little to suggest we’d be compatible. I consider it a compliment that the girlfriend responsible wants me to meet this fellow. However, this reminds me of a past situation where I was encouraged to go out with a guy solely based on the fact that we were both single. Honestly, that’s not criterion enough for me to want to meet a guy. So, for future reference, here’s my “I have someone I want you to meet” checklist.

1. We must have something in common (other than being single): Does he like to write? Does he like museums, too? Do we each possess a dry sense of humor? Did we both shock you with our vast knowledge of ‘80s hip hop? If you’ve answered yes to these questions, then maybe I’d like to meet this guy. If the only similarity between us is that neither of us has plans for Valentine’s Day, then I’ll pass.

2. He has to meet your standards: If you know you’d never date this guy, even if you two were the last two living beings on the planet, then please don’t pass him my way. If he’s still living at home, has six children by four different women, and you have cause to question his sexuality, I take back my earlier sentiment about considering the hook up a compliment. I’m now insulted.

3. He has to be 100% single: My life is pretty drama free. Don’t introduce me to the guy who saw me on your Facebook page and asked for a hook up even though he’s still in a situation. I don’t want to create any love triangles or get involved with any guy who’s not only carrying around baggage, but is struggling trying to make room to stuff more crap in. I’ll stay where I am where it’s nice and roomy.

If the guy stands up to these top 3 criteria, I’ll be more than happy to take it from there.

At the risk of never being hooked up again, I’m posting this for every SIS out there who has been set up with a guy only to sit there wondering what in the world your friend was thinking when she decided to match you with him! The truth is that, she probably didn’t give it too much thought. She saw two pleasant single people, and decided to channel her inner Chuck Woolery. Don’t look at it as a personal reflection on you. Just send her this entry to help guide her if you think she might try it again. She’ll get the point.


Outing the Secret Significant

If you weren’t sure, or if I left some question in your mind, I want to state for the record, that I’m single.

Maybe if I had a significant other, I would have an answer for the following question: What does it mean when your boyfriend or girlfriend doesn’t acknowledge you at all on Facebook?

I know a few people who are in relationships; although, there’s no “In a Relationship” indication on their pages. They’re going on romantic vacations, but not posting any photos, or sharing even vague, general details with those they obviously consider friends. On Valentine’s Day, there was no status update about spending quality time with that special someone.

As far as the World Wide Web is concerned, these folks are pretty much single.

Like I said, I don’t have a significant other, but I’d imagine that if I did, this would irk me a bit and make me wonder: Is he ashamed of me? Is he assuming I won’t be around long enough to worry about “introducing” me to his friends? Is he a playa, making sure available women don’t think he’s taken?

Maybe they’ve had a discussion and both decided not to mention the relationship. Maybe they’re waiting for a specific anniversary before going public with the news, but unless you’re Brangelina, what’s with all the secrecy? It’s not like you’re going to get mobbed by the paparazzi. Sure, you may get a few questions, but I’d imagine the feelings of the secret significant should trump that minor annoyance.

I’m not suggesting that people update their relationship status 30 minutes after it changes, but I think I’d be perturbed if a boyfriend of mine posted photos of his life but left out all the ones with me in them. Hopefully, any guy I end up dating exclusively wouldn’t shy away from posting a photo of the two of us and writing a caption identifying me as his girlfriend. I guess one could argue that such displays aren’t a big deal, but if that’s the case, then why avoid them?

Luckily, this isn’t anything I have to worry about, but for the sistah out there whose boyfriend seems to have an aversion to mentioning your existence on his cyber profiles, this is for you.

July 2018
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