Sometimes a SIS is just looking for someone to hang out with and keep her company for a while. Other times, she may be in search of something more substantial – something that might lead to a real honest-to-goodness relationship. However, just because she may be ready for something serious, doesn’t mean the guy who’s showing her interest is. More times than not, he’d be satisfied with something less meaningful.
How can you tell if he’s serious, or if he’s just looking for some fun? A mature guy will be upfront about it, and let you know. Of course, there are also those who like to play games. So, to help decipher what you’re dealing with, here are three ways to distinguish if he’s trying to put you in the jump off category.
Vampire Complex: You call him at noon. He calls you back at 9:30. You want to talk about his day. He wants to discuss plans for your night. When a guy is interested in entering into a serious relationship, he usually won’t mind communicating with you during daylight hours. If you only hear from the new guy while the sun is down, then it’s possible he’s trying to put you into the “booty call” category … or he might be a vampire, but the former is probably more likely.
Mono-Communication Complex: Most folks these days communicate several different ways. In one day, I may talk to a friend on the phone, send e-mails, text and maybe even chat online. If you’re only getting brief text messages, especially if they’re non-specific — like “what’s up?” — then it’s a good chance he really doesn’t care what’s up, and is not at all interested in making any sort of lasting connection with you. With all the different ways to reach out and touch someone, if he’s limiting contact, he may truly be interested in touching you, but not much else.
Homeboy Complex: As two people get more familiar with one another, they often start spending more time together at home. The trips to movie theaters, restaurants, parks and comedy clubs decrease. However, if the new guy’s idea of dating is limited to having you sit on his sofa or visit him in his bedroom (‘cause his roommate is in the living room), then he’s making it pretty clear what sort of activities he wants to share with you. As far as he’s concerned, why bother even getting dressed?
So, if he’s showing some interest, but it seems mild at best, he’s likely indicating that he’s not looking for anything serious. Whether it’s late-night contact limited to one form of communication, or “dates” that allow him to lounge around in undershirts and stretch out on his bed, consider it a sign that he’s looking for something to jump off, but that “something” probably isn’t a relationship.