06
Mar
10

Five Signs of an Angry Black Woman

Here’s something you won’t believe. Since starting this blog, I have been accused of being an Angry Black Woman. (Unbelievable! I know!) It hasn’t happened often, and I personally don’t think I’ve been hostile at all, but I took a step back and tried some introspection.

At the risk of reinforcing a negative stereotype, I have to admit that there is such a thing as Angry Black Woman (ABW) syndrome. It is worth stating that not every SIS suffers from this ailment (and not every angry person is black or single).

So, while I tried to determine whether there was any validity to the ABW accusation made against yours truly, I came up with a list of five signs I think separate the ABW from regular folks who limit their anger to obscene hand gestures made toward the horrible driver in the next lane.

Here’s the list of signs I came up with.

You Might Be an ABW If…:

You’re Constantly Urged to Seek Therapy (or Jesus)
Of course, not all church invitations are extended because of suspected anger management issues, but if your friends respond to what you consider normal venting, by inviting you to Sunday service and/or suggesting you seek professional help, you might have a problem. If more than a few confidantes have advised you to get counseling or pastoral guidance, they are telling you: (1) your issues are too big for them to handle and (2) only God, or someone trained to deal with insane or possessed people, can help you.

You’re a Hater
If you’re an ABW, it’s hard for you to take your eyes off your own discontentment long enough to be happy for somebody else. You’ll look for any excuse to avoid celebrating weddings, baby showers, housewarmings, promotions or anything that you would prefer be happening to you. A twinge of jealousy isn’t abnormal, but a tirade about how life isn’t fair because you deserve all the good fortune others are experiencing, is a symptom of the syndrome.

You Aren’t Being Asked Why You’re Single
I know. It’s an annoying question, “Why are you single”? However, I take it as an indicator of my loveable charm. For the life of them, those around me cannot understand why some guy hasn’t seen all the wonderful attributes and characteristics they see in me. So, it stands to reason that if no one’s asking you why you’re single, it might be because the reasons are clear to them. A rotten attitude might be the cause.

You’re Never Satisfied
A neighbor offers to shovel your walk, but you complain that he didn’t clean off your car. A friend promised to go to a movie with you, but you’re angry at her ‘cause her unexpected coma ruined your plans. The ABW always finds a reason to fuss. There are very few silver linings or bright sides. The worst part? Even the rational irritations seem irrational when the ABW adds her tainted spin to the tales.

You’re Pissed Right Now
If you’re ready to get to cussin’ ‘cause all of the above traits remind you of yourself, then you probably got a problem.

Considering that it’s my list, I might be biased, but after reviewing these traits, I’ve concluded that I am not an angry, black woman. LOL.

Are you?

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8 Responses to “Five Signs of an Angry Black Woman”


  1. March 6, 2010 at 1:10 pm

    Lol luvs this post. Well my friends do tell me I need Jesus or therapy, but moreso because I’m the goofy one in the group. Otherwise I’m glad to see I’m not angry. If anything I’m a passive black woman. As a reader, I don’t get that you’re an ABW. More like an enlightened one trying to help others not be angry.

  2. 2 sistah1
    March 8, 2010 at 4:17 pm

    THANK YOU, TONI!!

  3. 3 Ronnie
    March 8, 2010 at 4:28 pm

    No, definitely not an Angry Black Woman, but could there be a little mean streak that people are picking up on?

  4. 4 sistah1
    March 8, 2010 at 4:44 pm

    LOL @ Ronnie. Just ’cause you annoy me, doesn’t mean I’m mean! Just be glad you’re not in hitting distance right now! LOL.

  5. 5 blackbarbiekj
    March 9, 2010 at 12:55 pm

    LOL! I think this was the “funniest” one yet.

    I think as a “SIS” you are often viewed as “angry” cause you single no matter HOW you act… so some of us “SIS” ‘s are constantly checking ourselves because we don’t want non single folks to pick our statements apart- LOL but your list made it very clear….LOL

    I guess I ain’t angry (but have angry tendacies) but for real, if one more person ask me why I am single…I am going to scream… LOL (even though I guess like SIS blogger wrote its a compliment)….
    :)

    FUNNY! Keep them coming!

  6. 6 Sabrina
    December 29, 2010 at 12:18 pm

    Do you know what really makes me “angry?” The assumption that ONLY Black women are “angry” and are somehow irrepairably flawed, therefore making us beyond hope of ever finding a man, marrying and being like normal women. The whole “angry black woman” stereotype” presumes that women in all the other races are oh-so-perfect and virtuous and “better.” or at least more to be pitied than censured…and it seems to me we Black women are constantly being censured! Seems like people can never find anything positive to say about us who are women of color. Nothing but faultfinding. Yet, I know white, Hispanic and Asian women who are just as “angry” and “bitter” as Black women are accused of beinging. Yet you don’t see the papers or the internet bombarded with articles about “Angry White Chicks” or “bitter Latinas” do we? Even if a sista is ‘angry’, so what? Maybe we have a right to the full range of our emotions, same as anyone else…wonder why no one considers that? Why should we have to constantly ‘stuff our feelings’ just so someone else can be ‘comfortable’ around us. To me, that “angry black woman” label is just a way of others attempting to keep us under control and not allowing us to be our authentic selves, happy or angry or otherwise.

  7. 7 Matilda
    March 5, 2011 at 5:23 pm

    I’m angry and I’m white and middle class. I’m angry because my male colleagues consistently get paid more than me and do a far poorer job. It doesn’t seem to matter which workplace it is, there is the “protected penis posse” who just seem to get away with everything.

    I admire my sisters for telling it like it is. If there’s anyone who deserves to be angry, it’s probably a African American woman. You guys have been through hell and back and it’s great to hear that you aren’t going to sit around passively anymore!


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